“If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all” is actually a direct quote from a cartoon bunny, the very infamous Thumper (‘Bambi’). He was so right really because saying something nasty doesn’t do anything at all except maybe hurt feelings and dirty up the vibrations with negativity.
We must make a conscious effort sometimes to avoid making negative statements. If we are constantly making a comments to point out negatives it gets to be a real habit. Some may seem perfectly harmless like ‘what lousy weather’. Isn’t it bad enough that the weather IS lousy? Can’t everybody see that? Then why do we need to magnify it by pronouncing the fact?
If you begin to watch yourself on this you will see how many things you say just to make conversation, once it becomes a bad habit. You would be very surprised how people, whether consciously or subconsciously begin to see you as a negative person when you make negative statements.
We can’t avoid a certain amount of negativity in this life if for no other reason than polarity but there is no reason to glorify it. So when you start to say something that could be construed in any way to be negative either don’t say anything or turn your statement in such a way that it is not negative. For the weather for example, ‘They say it is going to heat up tomorrow’.
This all may seem irrelevant to you but it is highly relevant not only to business relationships but also to marketing. Listen and watch a real marketing expert sometime. It makes you feel downright guilty when you hear them turn everything negative into something positive.
For instance you say ‘man, business is really slow this week’ – He will not say ‘woe is me’. He will say ‘business will pick up’. Or you complain about a customer’s behavior – ‘he really doesn’t get it’ – and your marketer will say ‘he will do just fine once he learns’.
This all also relates to the art of forgiveness which is much more difficult than you would imagine. You must not feel offended. Even if somebody has done something to you that really hurts – you just turn it into something positive like ‘he knows not what he does’. Let him off the hook. This is not to say enable him or that he is entitled to hurt you. This is about freeing you up from the negative thoughts and feelings that poison you and sometimes cause you to project them, making yourself appear negative to others who usually don’t understand.